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20 February 2011, 06:11
Earth beneath my feet.
Strings attached. Unevenly balanced. Bravely fearful. Calmly yelling. Inhaling suffocation. Sometimes we're opposites, but at the same time, we're so similar. Unwillingly willing. Weakly strong. Stubbornly patient. Impatiently attentive. You are my gravity. Keeping me insanely sane. From sunrise to sunset (in all time zones). From being my first thought when I wake up to the being the last thought before I sleep. I am captivated by you. Aggressively gentle. Rationally irrational. Hopelessly hopeful. Inspirationally tiring. I am undeniably in love with you. I miss you so much. I'd lose sleep to talk to you. Your voice. It's like orchestra music to my ears. Colliding with my inabilities to shut my eyes and venture onto the subconscious's dreamland. My more than's aren't more than enough. But right now, I'm more than in love with you. I more than miss you. And my illogical logic shouldn't strike you with confusion, but with certainty.
16 February 2011, 06:24
Mindless Thinking
Visualizing how two can become one. How that one combination of two can result in power. How that power can be hard to maintain and easy to strip away. How a process can be repeated, altered, or strengthened.
Sometimes things take a little more effort to provide proven and efficient results. You can substitute any situation in this concept I’m explaining. Eventually you’ll get a re-occurring thought in your mind. And this constant thought will never go away unless it reaches expected and established acquiring.
So, here’s to all the experimenting, doubting, mindless thinking. Soon enough, time will take its toll and display more means of deciphered, mindful, and clear-conscious thoughts for all of us.
15 February 2011, 05:47
either i'm drained, miserable, or mentally unstable
I feel so unprepared, feel like a failure, an aborted mission due to extensive unfortunate difficulties. I don’t know why the hell I feel so exhausted. I’m used to not sleeping at night. I’m used to studying for exams until my eyes wear out. I’m used to feeling alone and shit when I’m in my room, thinking about that kid in the Marine Corps. So I can’t figure out why I feel emotionless right now. It’s fucking driving me insane. I want to study for my communications exam for tomorrow. I do. My brain is demanding my attention, but my mind is restraining. I guess one theory I learned about in psychology about how the mind is separate from the brain is much more rational than the other. Any ideas why a person can feel like this? And don’t give me some post-miserable valentine’s day junk. That isn’t it at all. I need the strength because I’ve only taken one out of four exams for this week. Add me to your prayer list. This girl’s barely going to survive the next few days.
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I'm a soul-consuming individual. Passion extends to immense measures through my initiation. I write with reason. Occasionally, I make logic, but it's rare to become on a stable comprehensive level with me for I am naturally unpredictable. I am big on spontaneity and I get a radiant kick out of adventure. I love tremendously. I don't expect to become famous but I do have high standards when assumed to encounter someone fresh. I choose whom I want to stay and assist me in living and all that luxurious privileges. Not the girl next door. I'm not ordinary, not amazing.