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27 May 2009, 07:38
My boom boom boom
Lately, I've been zoning out and it's become worse than your average day dreaming and down the border line of fantasizing. I cannot recall a last valuable rendevous or anything worth speaking of. Today I swore to withhold another year of deceit and relentless bullshit. To speak on behalf of everyone is an honorable duty, but it's not enough. Make sense? I mean, how many times do I have to be accused of crime and poor judgement? I was instantly attracted. Your frightening vibe was seemingly uncalled for. Your fright lingered toward my direction and grasped my inner gulp for breath. I was attracted to your fear and your lack of personality.
19 May 2009, 08:33
You must think I'm crazy
/Ah-mazing. I ♥ it when you can point out the obvious obscurity./
Teens nowadays struggle not only with quote changes unquote, a feeling they deem to be emphasized: love, unbelievably bullying, oh-so-luring peer pressure, and maybe even self-discovery. Okaaay, so maybe we undergo more than what I have just mentioned, but go figure right? High school today is beyond your imagination. Through observation and of course being a student in high school makes things less obscure to believe. You can't recall pep rallies being to support your school anymore. Behind that excuse for your padres is a hidden message most likely relaying "time to hang out with my lover." Oh, and the infamous 'cliques' you'd encounter are just insane. You'd think being anti-abolotion is bad. Separating preps and goths are even worse. What to expect is unexpectedly unknown.
06 May 2009, 02:14
Doubts
This isn't a fiasco. It's more than just all fun and games. Priorities are always important and I'm aware of all of these things. The extra work I'll have to do. The extra mile I'll have to run. The improvements I'll eventually accomplish. As of now, this hour, I am pooped. My eyes are worn out, my mind a mess, my heart harmed, and my confidence at risk.
You know as time progressed and hours passed, I thought I was done dealing with all the issues I just don't need at the time. I was wrong. These strings are just getting pulled too tight because they are all being pulled at the same time. These strings are making simple things seem so complicated. These strings are tangled up in me and my life. These strings are attached and are too far tense to be untangled.
These strings are my rivals.
In situations like this, we are left with nods and silence.
We are occasionally doubting everything, everyone; including ourselves.
We are overanalyzing expressed thoughts.
We are frustratingly saying the wrong things though we agree they are right.
We are overwhelming ourselves.
We are tired.
I honestly do not think any less of you right now; after what happened. I honestly do not know how to respond. I honestly do not want to deal with you. And I honestly need my space.
It isn't because you literally put an uninvolved person at fault that I am done.
It isn't because you obviously made it worth pitying you that I am done.
It isn't because I disagree with you that I am done.
It isn't because I kept a lot of my thoughts to myself that I am done.
It isn't because we are extremely viewing this differently that I am done.
It isn't becayse we aren't exerting enough work that I am done.
I am done because I feel as if I have no further hope with you.
I am done because I can see that I refrain from you for no reason.
I am done because maybe I just could not prove to you as I proved myself.
I am done because we're too caught up, too zoned out, too darn alike.
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I'm a soul-consuming individual. Passion extends to immense measures through my initiation. I write with reason. Occasionally, I make logic, but it's rare to become on a stable comprehensive level with me for I am naturally unpredictable. I am big on spontaneity and I get a radiant kick out of adventure. I love tremendously. I don't expect to become famous but I do have high standards when assumed to encounter someone fresh. I choose whom I want to stay and assist me in living and all that luxurious privileges. Not the girl next door. I'm not ordinary, not amazing.