Sepia-tone Loving

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I'm a soul-consuming individual. Passion extends to immense measures through my initiation. I write with reason. Occasionally, I make logic, but it's rare to become on a stable comprehensive level with me for I am naturally unpredictable. I am big on spontaneity and I get a radiant kick out of adventure. I love tremendously. I don't expect to become famous but I do have high standards when assumed to encounter someone fresh. I choose whom I want to stay and assist me in living and all that luxurious privileges. Not the girl next door. I'm not ordinary, not amazing.
	30 August 2008, 10:06 Behind the scenes Seriously though, do you honestly think I would put a lot of thought into something so small yet entirely intriguing? Perhaps you're right, but you'll never know the truth. Unless of course I plan to tell you, which probably won't be until later.. later on. Whether it be a good or bad thing, keep in mind the previous expressions I've displayed and actions you've perceived in my daily habits. I am captivated by the thought of you, thinking of me. There are certain times when I wish I could just overlook this whole situation and make you my number one. You inspire me to keep myself rather interested. We'll put it that way... The feasible attraction is now intact in our hearts. The original plan was not intended as an accident, obviously. What's more important? Distance or Time. It feels like a math equation now though we both know that math is my weakpoint. So in your opinion, what's easier: distance or time? First of all, let's look at the facts. 1.) Possible attraction is now an instant relationship. 2.) Whether or not this bond is strong, I feel the liveliness coming out of it. The advantages I've learn to accept. but 3.) Both schedules have a particular arrival and depature; none tyng into the other's... In an hourglass, we have an hour or less; depending on how we use our time, but with our distance, will we ever be able to sacrifice time? It's confusing now, even for me. Whatever happens, happens. No turning back, no taking back. I feel in a giving mood. 28 August 2008, 08:15 My SURROUNDINGS. I heard a quote today and it made me think. If you know me well enough, you'd know that I think way too much; to the point where I confuse and disappoint myself all in one. Well the quote went something like this, "You have to learn how to follow in order to lead." yeah, it's from Drumline geez. Not that my thoughts were revolving about music, but it made me think about myself and my current state of being. I guess you can say that I am a bit authoritative at times, idk. Going back to the quote... it's complicated to explain, but this is mainly from experience. Is it possible to be a follower and leader at the same time? Does it depend on what kind of leader you are or what role you play? It has come to my attention that following others makes you a better leader. I follow people who benefit my life. It's like an inspiration issue, I guess. NO CLUE, idk. NEW topiccccccc; fuck I love life now. No more grudges, woo. btw, I hate it when people ask "Why so serious?" it's honestly irritating! ha;] anyway, im glad i got a lot of things off my chest tonight. I think it's time to take the next step, which is to attempt my future alliance. Making a connection between foolishness and seriousness. I'd like to stay neutral in this case. It's way more comfortable, honestly. I remember the beginning; not so much different from now... Taking things slow in a well-paced manner. I'm ready when you are; moving forward. Just waiting perhaps. sooooooooo, the end for now. ha ;p 25 August 2008, 05:07 Stupidity. Remembering the times when life was viewed as a carefree whole. The times when people felt free to let go. The repetitive phrases we just couldn't comprehend, the constant heartbreaks that we'd always mend. Second week into school; interesting. If only the halls were painted green and white, if only the campus made up the dimensions of a square. If only... Well it definitely breaks my heart to immediately have to walk into a school I just couldn't call home. It's not the same at all, oh my. I used to be able to hear the roaring students when being entertained by a bunch of talented or not so talented pursuing dancers, singers, comedians, etc. It was crucial for them to fuck it all up and especially the so-called superior person who just doesn't have heart to place us in an environment consumed with so much heat and sweat. It's a whole other desert in that place or so my fellow classmate considered it a living hell. He referred to the long bus rides as that, but I'd say it describes the school in general too. I've learned to accept the gecko's sincere gratitude for making us host classes on their territorial grounds though. I think they're the most affected; I mean 40 minutes a class period is so ridiculous. No wonder... no comment. Fucking reptiles though, ew! I'm loving the beginning though. :) The rewarding friends I have, the extended hours of sleep I'd get, the obsolete thought of happiness awaits my everyday regards. If that makes any sense, I'm sure I'll figure it out sooner or later. Time is a virtue, woooo. I'm tired of this stupid ass shit you pull, luring me into guilt and sorrow. Shit, it's nothing but pretentious whining. I have grown to be the better person. I walk away when I want to, which is majority of the time. I love my clear conscience which certainly fills my heart with the hope for happiness each day. I am soooo glad you finally discovered another. Sucks that she's never there for you. I'd be miserable with you too except I'm passed that stage. So much for a bestfriend, right? Hugs, never cared for them. Conversations, couldn't ever have a decent one with you. It's all about the feelings that just never came out right for us. Go Figure. Like my mom's tshirt literally points out, Fuck the world. I'd call myself a hypocrite too except I find myself indecisive all the time and I guarantee stupidity with me 24/7. Quite frankly, I love life but not when things can change in an instant. blahblahblah, I can be a no-lifer. Though I go out a lot, it's not easy being a busybee. I jump from subject to subject, waiting for my thoughts to lift and and I have no idea what I say during this certain period of time. Sometimes I think I suffer from bipolar disease because I seriously feel clueless and I'm prone to mood swings. El fin, sckrs. 09 August 2008, 22:15 Transitioning, Things have changed since the start of summer 2008. Another story, another journey. To dream of another being, to be in another's heart. Learning to let go, move on, and be happy.